The aim of life is to live and to live means to be aware, joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware. - Henry Miller.

Being yourself what does that mean
Seeing yourself is the hardest thing
Being yourself is a lonely thing
If you never pick it up and just let it ring
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visited *loading* times
1. release a book into the wild
2. clean my room up
3. move out
4. not go crazy at work this week
5. minutes

J and me after his commissioning parade a couple of weekends ago.
fifth trip down with Mr "needed a heart". today he was really tired, and was starting to complain of intercostal muscle pains from the weaning process. going downstairs doesnt seem to thrill him anymore, but he's forever thankful to the consultant for letting it happen. his sister is really nice to me too, and today sneaked me a bottle of foot rub. COOL. it's a good chance for me to have a tea break though, and to chat with the nurses and the anaesthetists. although last month's team was better looking. haha.
the boss announced as well that FINALLY we may be going online together with the rest of the hospital's departments in terms of booking appointments for patients and stuff. and surprisingly, it was met with pretty much unanimous resistance from the staff members. they want to control the number of patients that get booked in. i would have thought that the computer system would prevent overbooking too. but ah well. my opinion is that many of them are just technophobes and like doing things the way they do them now... manually. but we're just falling behind the rest of everyone if we keep doing things that way. boss then said that we should have less staff meetings (hurrah!) and only meet if necessary, or once every quarter. i totally agree. but once again, people were afraid that if we didnt meet every month we would socialise with each other less and there would be less 'mandatory social interaction' within our department!!
my goodness.
so now it's come down to meeting when necessary with boss, and when it's not necessary, the social welfare team of the department will organise staff get-togethers so that we wont miss out on this lunch time socialising.
gosh.
i guess all my lunch breaks will be spent with my colleagues then. mandatorily. and only so.
so i dont know anymore, maybe i just dont fit in this social environment; or am i just insane to want to have lunch in some peace and quiet without any talk of disabled people, sputum, surgeons, wards, etc etc?
**************
spent sunday at SAFTI. i can't believe i did it. Me, in an army camp. gosh, what next? J was having his commissioning parade and i was invited to view it. pretty darn freaky to see so many guys all looking so similar... but yes, me with an army personnel. i'm still coming to terms with that fact. the ball's this saturday and i'm kinda busy trying to figure my outfit out. i just can't make my mind up sometimes about clothes; let alone men!
especially when after you break up they still interrupt your sleep by making guest appearances in your dreams.
lacuna inc. where are you when i need you?!
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