Little Frolick

The aim of life is to live and to live means to be aware, joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware. - Henry Miller.

say No to capitalism - STEAL

a long night

you on my mind

fragments of thought - memory of skin

how long does it take for something to disappear

love's half-life and then some

marks on my skin

welts on my heart

the time apart - wishing you were near

can i stir them away like coffee in a cup

dissolve its bitter graininess

insane i would be to wonder why it's not you with me

the puddles appear and glimmer then fade

beyond

begin

 

 

posted by: crysalis at 22:36 | link | comments |

the hospital is no longer a teenager!

 

 

the dinner and dance was a bit more fun than i thought it would be! although i never like ten course chinese dinners because i just feel overwhelmed by the amount of MSG and gooey consistencies of the dishes.

spent the rest of the night after the hospital party talking and roaming the streets at night with J who got me a whole big jar of jellybeans!

 

posted by: crysalis at 13:10 | link | comments |

fascination retention

i'm so glad today is over. i had the worst nightmare in the longest time last night - and have repeated the story of it to too many people already today. it was so haunting. i don't know if i am just overworked?

which brings me to my frustration with the department once again. i'm just so tired of working for them - i think i have grounds to complain for the amount of work i have to do; which is just practically impossible for anyone! unless i do a rubbish job with my patients providing little therapy for them.

but i can't! i have my own pride that gets in the way of me doing a shabby job.

i'm so frustrated. i think i'm spread way too thin at work; but does anyone care? i really don't think so.

anyway, my heart transplant patient got out of bed today! after about 20 days of being in bed...  waiting for a heart he is, just like me i suppose. in another sense of the word.

another patient died; but this time i actually spent quite a fair bit of time with him. it doesnt pay to get to know your patients too well you know.

i guess i am getting somewhere in my own personal development though; a colleague of mine said that i am looking more and more beautiful everyday and wondered what my secret was - i yelled across the hallway to her saying 'Fall in love!' How cliche... but it's true! Not that i'm like really in love; perhaps soon! perhaps all the quiet reflecting and yoga classes are paying off. And learning how to give of myself without expecting anything in return - breathing in and out - everyday i teach people how to breathe slowly and deeply; i guess i'm getting the benefits of it myself!

ah well.

tonight i'll lie content for all that i've done. [it's what you do that defines you] i have a craving for lemon chicken.

___________________________________________________________________

What if there was no lie
Nothing wrong, nothing right
What if there was no time
And no reason, or rhyme
What if you should decide
That you don't want me there by your side
That you don't want me there in your life
What if I got it wrong
And no poet or song
Could put right what I got wrong
Or make you feel I belong

What if you should decide
That you don't want me there by your side
That you don't want me there in you life

Ooh ooh-ooh, that's right
Let's take a breath, try to hold it inside
Ooh ooh-ooh, that's right
How can you know it, if you don't even try
Ooh ooh-ooh, that's right

Every step that you take
Could be your biggest mistake
It could bend or it could break
That's the risk that you take

What if you should decide
That you don't want me there in your life
That you don't want me there by your side

Ooh ooh-ooh, that's right
Let's take a breath, try to hold it inside
Ooh ooh-ooh, that's right
How can you know when you don't even try
Ooh ooh-ooh, that's right

 

posted by: crysalis at 21:39 | link | comments |

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